Saturday, February 28, 2015

Lunch Tease


This dream came a couple of weeks after the encounter in my last post.  I feel like I'm always waiting, and you are always keeping me needy through our texts between visits.  All of that build up and constant teasing led to this dream...


You texted me first thing in the morning with a Let's have lunch.  Come over at noon.  I was already excited.  The text hadn't woken me, since I was up early thinking about not thinking about you.  It had been a couple of weeks since I saw you and had resigned myself to stop hoping you would be free.  I can feel myself getting wet already and I slip a finger down to feel. For a brief moment, I think about continuing, but decide that I have a lot to do.  I jump in the shower and make sure that everything is perfectly smooth, soft and ready to be touched.  I rub lotions and oils in to keep everything supple and can feel that I am wet again already.  I decide to stay completely nude as I do my makeup and hair so that I am not soaking through my underwear already.  My husband walks by and raises an eyebrow, but doesn't ask what I have planned today.  I smile slyly and say nothing myself.  I select my underwear with care, not that you care.  It's for me.  The matching bra and underwear are cool against my skin and hold me tightly, binding me.  I picked a lace set to hide just how wet I am thinking about seeing you.  It's warm out so I pick a dress. The dress is lusty and definitely not lunch appropriate.

The dream jumps and I am pulling up to your house.  I can hear Take me to Church playing on my stereo as I take second to put your red lipstick on.  As I step out of my car, I can feel how slippery wet I am already and can't wait for you to touch me.  You greet me at the door and your hazel eyes burn into me, I have to look away.  You pull me close, pick me up and pin me against the door.  You kiss me hard and deep and push me harder against the door.  I can feel the molding sweetly digging into my back.  You slide your hand to my legs, currently wrapped around you, and guide them down so that I am standing again.  I hear you breathe into my ear asking if you can check.  I barely get out a please before you are already plunging into me and I feel you grin with satisfaction and you let out a whispered good girl.  And then you let go.  You turn and I am left panting and wondering what you are doing.  You turn back to me and ask me if I'm coming.  We are still going to lunch?!?  Ugh. 

I don't remember a drive or even getting in your car.  We are at sitting in the restaurant and are ordering food.  I'm trying to take you in and not get overwhelmed with need.  You, of course, are staring.  You do this when you know I am avoiding your gaze.  The waiter is gone and we are by ourselves.  And then you start in.  This is not going to be a typical lunch where we talk about mundane things.  You are telling me about the things that you want to do to me when we get home.  Telling me about how much you want to taste my pussy, pin me down and finger fuck me until I explode, fucking and stretching out all of my holes, etc.  I have heard all of it before and experienced most of them, but I can't help but to turn red with desire.  I'm not embarrassed, but I do feel very naughty.  The waiter keeps coming by and I'm still very needy from a little earlier.  I'm silently thanking God that I just ordered some soup because I'm not going to last very long.  It's always torture having lunch with you, having to set across from you and wanting to touch you in public.  This is so much worse.  I feel like I'm being water boarded and cannot breathe.  Pounding me with more and more dreamy thoughts, never giving me a moments rest.  You did not order something light and are taking your sweet time eating while asking me questions about what you are saying and if I want that too.  Deep inside of me, I am throbbing. I am done with my soup, sitting quietly trying to keep my breathing under control and I reply with, "no, I don't want it, I need it."  At this point, I am afraid that there is going to be a huge wet spot when I do get up. 

The next thing I know is we are in your car.  Your hand is innocently in my lap and you are sort of singing along with the radio.  I feel your hand slip under my dress and caress my upper thigh and you can feel just how wet I am as it has escaped the confines of my panties long ago.  You are smiling now, but still singing. I cannot hear what you are signing as I can only feel at this point, concentrating on your hand.  I am willing you to move farther up, but you don't.  Still teasing me.  I am watching you.  You, for a change, haven't looked at me once since we got in the car.  My hand is on yours tugging for it to move closer, but you are being stubborn.  You won't touch me, so I decide to touch you and reach over with my free hand and place it on your cock.  I feel you adjust a little, but you give nothing else up.  You don't stop singing, you don't move your hand. Nothing. So I apply a bit of pressure and do what you won't, gently rubbing.  I do this as until we pull into your garage.  You calmly get out of the car and walk to the house.  You hold the door open for me as I walk in and as you let the door go, you wrap your arms around me and pull me in.  Then you kiss me deeply. 

That was it.  I never got to go back in the bedroom.  Needless to say I was ready to go when I woke up this morning.

Wednesday, February 25, 2015

Rainy Day


This was the first time I was asked to retell an actual encounter between Jay and I.  He had a very important day today and nailed it, so I thought I would post another day where he skillfully nailed it for me.

I hurried up the stairs to your house, braving the cold and the rain getting wetter with every step.  You opened the door and the house is warm, always beckoning for me to come in and take my clothes off.  You are shirtless and look ready to devour.  Unlike my dreams where I am brave, I do not make eye contact. I pause for a moment to take you in and your immediate compliments undo me.  I'm wearing your red lipstick today, and you notice immediately so I'm not sure I'll get a kiss hello since I know you want it around your cock.  You move closer to kiss me and I know I need it badly.  I linger for a moment, hesitant because my hands are cold, but I have to touch you.  Feel your warmth radiating out begging to be caressed.  And when I do touch you, you don't flinch.  We kiss for a moment longer while your hands begin to explore beneath my pants and I kiss you harder.  You pull away and lead me back to your room.  The door shuts and my mind quiets. 

You turn me to face you and begin to undress me.  I love when you do this, even when it doesn't come easy.  This time I am rewarded with how good I smell.  You ask me to lay back, and instead of undressing you come with me.  You kiss me and my hands immediately wrap around your neck.  I am obsessed with how this feels, my hands on your neck or in your hair. You make a comment about me not liking to be kissed and I am in shock.  I love being kissed, especially by you and I've never said anything different.  While I'm thinking about where this comment comes from, you place your finger on my clit, and my whole body jumps in surprise.  I know that you have eating pussy on your mind, but I have an immediate need for you to be inside of me and go searching in your pants for your cock.  You have no underwear on and I'm tickled inside.  I can hear you talking about me being wet, but I can't recall exactly what you have said.  Just when I have found my prize, you pull off of me.  I come up also, so I can see what you are doing.  You are untying orange drawstrings that I'm sure I've never seen before, and then you unveil my prize and an almost audible yes escapes my mouth.  You watch me taking you in. I've worked hard and been patient for this, and I will take a moment to sit with you standing naked in front of me.  I've earned my moment to drink you in.  In this moment you are mine.  I could do this forever. I love looking at you naked, whether you are hard or not.  Fucking mesmerizing. 

Then you lead me down on my back as you get on your knees.  You are asking me to spread my legs and my pussy so you can see how fucking wet it is.  Jeez, you are a visual man.  I feel for a moment myself and am not disappointed.  So wet.  You come down onto me and immediately electricity bolts through me. You've been talking about going down on me for weeks and we haven't done it for months, so I'm not sure what is making me more excited.  The anticipation, the exploration of your tongue, your hot fucking breath as it hits my exposed clit, or the fact that I know that you are working yourself at the same time.  My hands release the bed and run through your hair, as I do my best to not grab you by your ears and fucking go to town.  Just when I'm not sure I can keep from doing just that, you pull up and get ready to fucking fill me.  All I can do is thank God.  I very much enjoy you eating my pussy, but I can't see you or anything thing other than my breasts, and I like to feel much more of you than that allows.

When you first enter me, it always takes a couple of times.  I'm not sure I'll ever be able to take you in with one fucking thrust.  My God you are big.  I do love the pain as my pussy finally grants access.  You are talking to me, but I can't comprehend what you are saying until you command me to watch as you are fucking me.  I gladly do this and reach around for your balls. I sometimes feel like I play too hard, and it's as if I just keep going I can get them inside of me as well.  Like a barrier I'm trying to overcome.  You have my legs up and bent and putting what feels like all of your weight on my thighs.  This becomes excruciating, but I cannot ask you to stop.  My body won't let me cry out.  I release your balls to help put pressure the other way on my thighs only to be asked if I will keep playing with them.  I can't help but to please you at this moment, so I relent.  I take the pain with every thrust.  You pull off of me and command me to my knees so that I can taste how my pussy tastes.

I get on my knees and immediately put you in my mouth.  Savoring your taste as well as mine.  You are asking me to suck like you have taught me, so I start to work your cock and with my mouth and hand.  I have not mastered this by any means so I am distracted by thoughts of am I doing it right, or that my mouth and hand are not yet in sync, and how I really need to stop a second and spit in my hand so that I don't hurt you.  You aren't guiding me this time, in fact you aren't touching me at all.  I wrap my free hand around your ass and pull you tighter to me. I don't suck harder, but I take you in deeper so I can help wet your cock and my hand. At this point though, I'm not helping as much as I am bearing down with my hand so I can feel every vein and ripple in your cock.  I can hear you saying that it feels good, so I stop worrying about all of those thoughts and keep going.  I trust you'll ask me to change something if it needs to be.  I want you to cum, but you are clearly not ready.  I'm not even sure I could make you cum this way.  You stop me and pull me up, turn me around and bend me over the bed. 

I think you will fuck my ass, but you don't.  As you slip into my pussy, I don’t have time to be anything but pleased anyway as I love when you are behind me.  I can see your balls hit me with every thrust, and I reach back to feel them.  To pull you closer to me.  Instead you want me to finger my clit while you are fucking me.  I am drier than I would like to be at this point, but I comply without spitting into my hand.  I have no spit anyway.  It feels good regardless, but I know it won't for long.  You ask if my legs are ok, but they are great.  They only get really shaky when you are fucking my ass, since I am tenser.  In fact, I really want you to fuck me harder and faster.  You won't let me stop fingering myself, and it drives the desire more.  I plead for you to fuck me hard. You ask what I said, and I can't tell if it's because you didn't hear me or because you want to hear me plead again.  I stop fingering myself again to speak louder only to be commanded to start again.  I plead louder for you to fuck me harder and you finally comply.  It feels so fucking good and I need it so fucking bad.  Now you start to talk about tying my hands behind my back and fucking the shit out of me just like this.  You talk about this often enough that I know it’s coming.  And what I know for sure is that it's making this moment even hotter, if that's at all possible.  I know you won't spank me today, afraid to mark me, and it been weeks since you have, so this will be as rough as I can get you to be.  Like a mind reader, you too are now talking to me about not spanking me which just makes me want it more.  I am thinking about begging for it. 

I can feel you spreading my ass open over and over again. And it is just begging to be fucked.  With so much force, you are out of me and pushing me to the bed hard with my leg sprawled out.  This has taken me by complete surprise and a little bit of force is so fucking hot.  You are now kneeling behind me and that expert tongue is running up and down my ass.  I cannot believe how good this feels and before I can wonder, your tongue is inside of me.  You are a fucking animal down there and if I had had any leverage whatsoever, I would have been bearing down on you it felt so amazing. 

I know I have lost fucking time, because the next thing I can remember is you still on your knees, I am now on my back and you are fingering the hell out of me.  It's all too much and it feels like I'm going to cum.  Something about me laying on my back seems to make it impossible though.  You are violent though and I do so love when you are fucking determined.  I can hear you telling me to let go, but before I can you are pushing me farther up on the bed, spitting on your hand and getting ready to fill me again. I am watching the head of your cock rubbing up and down my clit before entering and I can barely breathe. Then you are in and you feel amazing.  It's so good, and we are back to how we began.  Although, this time we are both so close to cumming that I know it won't last.  I can hear you talking about being close, but I can't possibly be asked to stop.  Not yet and so I ask for it to last a moment longer.  I can feel you getting closer too though, and I know that as much as I want to lock down on you and ride you until you cum, until I cum, I can't do it.  You have other plans and I can hear the need in your voice, so I relent. 

I am asked to get on my knees and suck your balls.  I love this and am surprised by how much I need this.  Your balls are so big, that I really have to work them into my very dry mouth.  I can hear you talking, but I have no idea what you are saying.  I'm lost in my task, so I stop for a second to hear what you are saying.  Other than telling me that you weren't asking me to stop, I still got very little of what you said.  I have switched sides, and you are working away at yourself.  I pull you tighter into me and start to get closer to your ass and I can feel the change in your body.  I can't see you from this angle, but I want to.  You grab a hold of my hair so tightly and pull me slightly back so that I have nowhere to go.  I can hear your say you are getting ready and then it hits.  Hard and furious.  I recall now you asking me and me telling you I wanted it in the face.  I'm not sure that it mattered, because when it hit me, it went everywhere.  In my mouth, in my eyes, on my breasts, in my hair, and oh yeah on my face. I swallowed what hit my mouth and reveled in your taste.  I can only imagine what I looked like.  It's funny to me even now, but when it was happening it seemed so much hotter than it probably looked to you. As I opened my eyes, and I could see your still dripping cock right in front of me, I couldn't help but to put in my mouth one more time to get the last bit.

Monday, February 23, 2015

Airport Drop Off


This was the first dream I ever wrote up for Jay, but not my first homework.  I'm skipping to this today because he is leaving town and as much as I want to drop him off this morning, I can't. 

So in my dream… it had been several weeks since I last saw you and you were leaving again, so we had arranged for me to take you to the airport. I woke up in need, fucking wet and practically panting from the anticipation of getting to see you, even if it would be short lived. It was warm out so I picked out a dress to wear and decided that I would make this as hard for you as it would be for me, so no underwear. I jumped in the car raced over as carefully as I could with my mind already occupied with what could be.

I pulled up to your house, got out of my car and waited for you to come out.  Just seeing you again in person was intoxicating enough and as I took a moment to breathe you in, I could already feel this was going to be much harder for me than I thought. You climbed in the car and as I climbed in I made sure to hike my dress up just far enough that it was clear that I wasn't wearing anything else. You asked and I smiled naughtily and confirmed that I was bare. Your look became heated and asked if you could feel. I confidently said no. I knew I wouldn't be able to stop if we started and I needed to be able to drive. I remember having to physically pull your hand away which was pure torture.

I don't remember any of the drive though. Then all of a sudden I was driving though the parking garage looking for an empty space. I couldn't just drop you off at the curb because I really had to be kissed and preferably hard. It hadn't been discussed, but you weren't complaining. I found a place near the back, pulled in and turned the car off.  We had some time, but not much.

By the time I parked, you were already reaching over to touch me. I leaned over to accept my well-deserved kiss, and you asked for permission to feel me. Before I could say anything, your hand was already finding and entering me. As a small sound of intense pleasure escaped me, I could feel the smile spread across your face. You clearly owned me and whispered so in my ear. Then ordered me in the backseat.

We both got out and as I did, I could feel my wetness running down my legs. It wouldn't take long for me. Before I could even get settled in the back, you already had your hands in my hair pulling me back and down to the seat. I was completely lost until your other hand found what it needed and you started to finger me. I can't even adequately put into words the power of that simple touch.  I released your neck and found your cock. I unzipped your pants and release your shaft. We still had to be very careful since you needed to keep clean for your flight, but I had a deep need to be penetrated, and needed it quickly. You let go of me and spit in your hand to get things moving closer to the edge for you. I watched intently, mesmerized by you pleasuring yourself. It wasn't long before I couldn't stand it much longer and brought my head forward to greedily take you in. You were about to ask me to do so anyway, but since I beat you to it, I had to take a second to smile with my own satisfaction. You were so fucking hard and soft at the same time I couldn't stand it. I started to suck harder, moving up and down the shaft, pulling you closer and deeper. I heard your breathing change and your hands were in my hair again to hold me still and suddenly I was tasting your sweet salty cum in my mouth.  I'm pretty sure I heard you say fuck and then I woke up.


Saturday, February 21, 2015

A little bit more


I thought I should talk a little bit more about what happened between that happy hour and our first real encounter.

A few short days later, I celebrated 12 years of marriage with my husband.  If you could call it celebrating.  I made him go see Gone Girl with me.  If you don't know why that's funny, go look up what the story is about.  He had wanted to take a trip, just the two of us, but I just wasn't in a place where I wanted to be alone with him.  It's been like this for about 2 years now.  This has little to do with my time with Jay, but thought you should get an idea of where my mind was at the time.

Jay and I talked a bit more by facebook until we ventured into text.  Conversations were pretty light.  How our days were going, what the kids were doing.  Lots of questions about each other.  There was a lot to learn.  I'm a pretty complex person, and I keep a ton hidden from everyone.  I'm sure everyone does.  A second happy hour was set up, although far fewer people were in attendance.  After all, it was just an excuse for us to see each other.  This time, far less drinking and I was way more nervous.  I honestly couldn't tell you what we talked about that evening, other than a brief conversation about me catching him checking out my boobs, which were nowhere near as concealed as the first time.  We all got up to leave and Jay asked for a ride to his car.  Jenny, Jay and I walked to the garage pretty casually, but I was already freaking out just a little.  Jenny walked on to her car and Jay climbed into mine.  I did manage to get him over to his car without hitting anything, but I was pretty distracted.  He leaned over to give me a hug and I was lost in his smell again.  I really wanted to kiss him, but I was just too conflicted.  A part of me just wanted him to take it from me (he was certainly strong enough and confident enough to have done it, but as I would later learn, he just isn't like that).  And the other part of me was still not ready to cross that line.  Later, he flat out asked me, "What if I kissed you?"  I didn't have an answer, at least not one that I could convince myself of being the right one.

After that, the texts were more frequent and less guarded. He's a picture taker, so there are a ton of pics of pretty much everything, not least of which is himself.  Which I thoroughly enjoy.  More just sharing our days. A couple of missed opportunities to meet up again, but at that point it wasn't that big of a deal to me.  Still conflicted of course.  About a month after we met the first time, our texts became much more sexually charged.  Jay had a dream about me where he could ask me anything and I had to answer.  He said it was very erotic, and then jumped straight to asking me when the last time I came was. It was jarring to say the least.  I wasn't used to someone being so upfront and asking what he wanted to know.  He pushed a little more and said he wanted me to cum that day, and then started to apologize when it was pretty clear I was uncomfortable with the question or the request.  No one wants to admit it has been a very long time. He backed off for several days.

I knew he was on a trip anyway, but I didn't want to stop talking.  When I knew he would be back in town, I reached out.  Something silly about a book I was reading about the power of being quiet.  That broke the silence and we slid back into easy conversation.  A couple of days later we finally had a chance to meet for a quick drink.  Just the two of us.  It was nice outside so we sat on the patio.  It wasn't as easy as our conversations by text.  The first thing he told me was that he was moving.  It was a great opportunity and would give his kids some distance from their crazy mother.  It was easy to talk to him about that.  Not so easy when the conversation turned to me and became more sexual in nature.  Me being me and hating talking about myself, still being so completely conflicted about the whole thing.  When I had to go, he walked me to my car and leaned in to give me a little kiss on my cheek.  I thought I was going to explode.  I wanted to pull him back in to kiss me properly.  Instead, I just shut the door and went back to get my daughter.

We texted almost immediately about the encounter. It was intense.  That was a second missed opportunity to kiss him.   I had talked to Jenny about him after the second happy hour.  I knew he would accept the kiss, even wanted it, but I wasn't sure if I did.  Or at least everything that would come with that kiss.  Jenny's advice?  Fuck him, he's hot.  Super helpful.  I flat out told him I should have kissed him.  I'm sure he felt the confliction in me and he never pushed me.   In that conversation though, I knew I had made my decision.  I was going to cross that line and as soon as possible.  We set up a lunch for the next week.

The morning of that lunch date, I woke up at 5am panting with anticipation.  There was not going to be another missed opportunity.  I just kept picturing in my mind walking in the door, dropping my purse, and flat out begging for him to kiss me.  He intimidates the fuck out of me though, so when I really did walk in, I barely even made eye contact.  Some work issue came up and I walked in irritated.  I just stood there awkwardly telling him about the problem.  He pulled me in and gave me a hug and I burried my head in his embrace.  My subconscious was screaming that I was going to blow this opportunity too.  Then I looked up at him and we kissed.  I'm not going to write about that kiss.  It's all mine.  I've talked about it with him many times since and it still makes me wet, weak in the knees, and changes my breathing just thinking about it.  What you need to know is that it was full of frustration and lust that had been building for a month.  It was the type of kiss that makes you forget just how fucked up your life is.  When he was done (I say he, because I sure the hell wasn't done), he pulled me away from the wall and led me to car to go out to lunch.  The most frustrating lunch I've ever had.  Wondering if that kiss would be all we do that day, if I even cared it was so good.  Fuck that, of course I cared.  I wanted him badly by the time lunch was over.  We did go back to his place and continued where we left off.  I'm not going to talk about that either.  Just know that it was fucking hot.  He is fucking intense in bed, knows exactly what he's doing, and does it with a sense of confidence that blows my mind.  He pushed me harder and farther than anyone else ever had before.  There was a lot I hadn't told him about my past that I felt effected every part of that interaction though.

When I left, I was lost in thought.  I felt everything and nothing at the same time.  I crossed the line, and I knew then that I wanted to do it again and again.  At the same time, I felt like a big piece of me didn't exist anymore.  I've always been a loyal person, even to a fault.  I can't ever say that again.  The thing that bothered me most was that I was more worried about how it made me feel about myself than I was about how much it would hurt my husband to find out that I cheated.  That made me feel worse.  Jay immediately wanted to talk about it, hear my thoughts.  You'll find that is a running theme in our relationship.  I was so far into self-loathing that I'm pretty sure made him feel like I felt like it was a big mistake.  The thing is, I didn't feel that way at all.  Text is no way to deal with this type of situation.

The next morning I asked if we could meet to talk.  And we did. It was very long, deep and intense, but by the end of it I knew I was hooked.  This was not going to be what I thought it was going to be, but I was in.  He now knew more about me that anyone else in my life, and I was oddly ok with it.

From that point it's been pretty full on.  I start my days with a good morning text from him and end my days with a good night text from me.  He travels a lot, so I see him when I can.  In between we stay in touch through texts that are constantly swinging between sharing mundane parts of our days to full on lust filled texts.  He loves to give me homework while he is gone and most of the stories that you will read in this blog stem from those assignments.

Friday, February 20, 2015

And so it begins


 I met Jay in late summer of last year. This blog is a collection of our encounters, the dreams I have of him, and possibly random thoughts about our not so traditional relationship.  This is how our story begins....

I received a text from my friend Jenny.  She's having a happy hour for a friend of hers.  It's his birthday.  I have met Jay once before, but other than being extremely good looking and a great dad, I wasn't left with much of an impression.  I haven't been in the mood to go out in months, but I also haven't seen Jenny in ages so I agree to go.  The day is warm and I feel more like myself after a long day of training.  I run home to grab my daughter from school, leave her with my husband and freshen up.  I've been training so I'm pretty put together already.  Jeans that hug my body, a sweet polka dotted top that hides my large breasts and a pair of high heel boots.  Last check of the lipstick and I'm off.

I arrive at the restaurant and I can hear the party I'm looking for from the door. I see Jenny and walk over.  She stands and gives me a big hug and then her husband takes his turn.  I turn to the man of the evening, who is also standing to greet me.  I recognize him immediately, and I don't at the same. He is tall, dark eyes, and slightly unshaven.  He is a big guy and his shirt is tight enough that I can see how solid he is. I'm struck with how he didn't make a bigger impression on me last time. He wraps his arms around me to give me a polite hug and I am enveloped by his smell.  I shyly wish him a happy birthday and he returns a thank you.

A chair has been pulled up for me sort of at the head of the table between Jay and Jenny's husband.  There are a few other people, some I know and some I don't.  We jump right back into the conversations.  The conversation swings from all of our children, to the dating scene when your older, to making sure you wash your face after you eat pussy.  This is exactly what I needed after the last couple of weeks going round and round with my husband.  I just want to have easy conversation.  This is made much easier by the constant rounds of margaritas. Every time I want to bow out, there's another one already sitting in front of me.

Throughout the evening, Jay and I end up having little private conversations.  I hear him end each little side chat with, "So we have that in common."  He's not wrong and it echoes through me every time he mentions it.  Both of us doing very well, despite having twisted childhoods.  We are both the caretakers of the people in our lives.  Always there for someone when they need it.  We both order the same food.  I'm not a person that finds conversations with people I don't know easy at all, but this is very easy.  I find myself wanting to share things with this man, but I do my best to hold back.  The most difficult thing about talking to Jay is eye contact.  I shy away from it and he seems to need it.  Moving to catch my eye and then not giving it up. 

At some point in the evening, we have a small conversation about cheating, and if it can ever work out. Jenny and her husband are a product of cheating and he points to them as a couple it seems to have worked out for.  I'm not that convinced.  It's an uncomfortable conversation for me as I have been struggling with this for almost 2 years.  I've never crossed the line though and don't like to dwell on the thoughts when I am having trouble wanting to engage with my husband at all.  Thankfully, we move on quickly and rejoin the group conversation.

It’s getting late in the evening and the margaritas are in full effect.  Jay casually asks if I need a ride home.  I thank him, but politely turn down the help.  Truth is, I need a ride and it's probably going to get worse on the drive home, but I don't trust myself at all right now.  We all give our hugs goodbye and I really just want the chance to be wrapped in his arms one more time before I go home.  It's warm and strong and doesn't last nearly long enough.

I do make it home, but it was a stupid thing to do for sure.   I feel the need to talk to him just a little more.  Plus, there is something telling me he'll want to know if I made it home ok.  I find where Jenny has checked us in and pull up his facebook profile to send a quick friend request.  Immediately it is accepted with a message letting me know he was going to check on me and I feel a warmth spread through me.  This is going to be trouble.